compromise,
How to make a relationship work.
Hello lovely readers,
Lately I've been reading lots of articles about relationships. Not because I am aiming towards these goals, tips or whatever it is saying in that article, but once in a while it is good to know how other people talk about relationships. Sometimes, those articles help me to see what I could change in mine or what we've been doing right. To be honest with you guys every single relationship is different and if some people follow rules and other create their own, it is up to them; the most important thing is to be happy. I've been in a relationship for the past year and everything is going good (knock on wood). My boyfriend and I have the same expectations when it comes to being in a relationship and we stick to them. My relationship is stress free and also honest. I talk with my man a lot and if something is bothering us we are going to discuss it.
In my opinion a relationship is good when you have some sort of routine, but not in the way that it gets boring and negative, but more like you spent the night at your partner's place when he/she is in town or have some common interests so that it is easy to stick to a plan. Another thing as part of a routine is to write a good morning and a good night message to your partner when you can't be with him for that day or when you are in a long distance relationship.
1. Communication!
I think this is the most important factor in a relationship. If there is no communication it cannot work. I know a lot of people who have issues with their partners and the main reason is because they don't talk to each other about their problems, they just ignore it and that cannot end well. That's why my main goal in my relationship is to communicate with my partner. I am also someone who likes to know how his day went and if something happened, even if nothing really major happened I still want to know because I am interested in what he is going to tell me. I want him to know that I am interested in his life when he is not with me. Asking him questions about his work or maybe about his favourite sport is important.
2. SEX
Yes, I just wrote the X word, but it is true. Sex is important in a relationship. It is actually for me a very important factor in my relationship, because sex is where we also really connect with each other. And guys it’s also so much fun. Having sex with someone you love is so reassuring and also comfortable. However, I like to spice up our love life a little bit. For example I wear some sort of extra lingerie or we somehow role-play a little bit. It makes it more fun and also exciting. I also really like when he surprises me by blind folding me. Being spontaneous in that area is important and also very exciting.
3. Compromise
Once in a while it is good to compromise, because it shows that you are able to do something for your partner even though you aren’t really excited about it. In my case it's going shopping with my man. I love shopping, if I had the money and the time I would do it every single day, but I live in the real world, so that’s why I just do it once in a while. However every time I want to go to the mall, my boyfriend always come with me, because he likes to spent time with me. He doesn’t really like to spend a whole day in boutiques and holding my bags, but he does it anyway because he loves me. I would also do the same for him. I wouldn’t even think twice about it.
4. Having some alone time
It can mean some alone time just for yourself with or without friends or also some alone time for you and your partner, together just as two. I like having date night with my boyfriend, because it’s our time, our moment, just he and I. We try to do it once a month, because we are still college students and I just see him on weekends, but when we do date night I like to go all out somehow. I like to get ready and pretty for him and I especially love going to more fancy restaurants, because I love me some nice food :D and he does too. It is important to get ready for your partner, because it shows that you still want to be attractive for the other one.
5. Variation
I’ve said it before, having a sort of routine is fine but a relationship needs variation too. Going away for the weekend, for a day or on vacation is a very good thing to do because you are not in your routine and you are in a different state/country. Going out with friends like to the cinema or for dinner or maybe just for a walk somewhere is also a good idea because you are with some other people and you aren’t doing something you do every day. I am pretty fortunate in my relationship, because we do try to go to certain events and also to go on vacation as often as we can. We like to explore the world, but together. Aren’t we such cheese balls :p
Of course trust, being faithful and also being kind to each other are also really important aspects in a relationship, but those are the ones that usually relationships already have. It is like the ground rules of a well working relationship. The tips I mentioned above are the ones that could fade away, but with a little bit of work it can be good again.
My relationship is almost perfect, 'cause perfect does not exist, but it is really close to perfection. I spent almost every single weekend with my man, because he does not study in the same country as I do, but it is close enough to see each other on the weekends. So during the week we have some alone time for ourselves and also we are busy with school and work, but we keep in touch every single day and we talk about everything and anything. I send him some pictures of what I am eating or silly pictures to make him laugh and vice versa.
I am someone who really likes to go out and spent time with my friends especially my best girlfriends, so I try to plan stuff with them during the week, but if it is not manageable we go out instead on Friday night or maybe Saturday. So even though, my boyfriend is in town, I can leave him for a few hours to have some girl time with my friends. We don't need to be together 24/7. He does not mind it and it gives him the opportunity to do stuff with his friends or to play some video games (that's his main hobby).
My man and I also like to combine friends and our time together, so we go out together with friends to a club or just for drinks. Another thing we really like to do is to be together but do different things at the same time, i.e. he is on his PC playing some League of Legends or Path of Exile while I am in the room next door or in the same one and I am playing with my PS4 or my Nintendo DS or watching some TV show. So we are together but we are doing stuff we individually like.
So those are the 5 rules/goals I'd like to maintain in my relationship. If you guys have some other tips on how to make a relationship work, please let me know in the comments.
I hope you guys enjoyed reading this post and talk to you later.
Xx, G.
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